Last night, we had our Thanksgiving Love Feast. A full Thanksgiving meal, with turkey, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes, and apple pie. I especially love sparkling cider and hot spiced apple cider. Good stomach prep for family Thanksgiving next week. During the meal, we had great fellowship and talking with each other about our different family traditions. Some of ours focus more on football, others the parade, while I'm always excited about spending time with family and the great food. We also wrote on a little paper leaf what we were thankful for. After the meal, we all went up to the microphone and read off our leaf before placing it on the Thanksgiving tree. As I sat watching everyone give thanks, I wondered why I was nervous. I'm just saying what I'm thankful for, and in my heart, I'm thankful for a lot. Why couldn't I just get up and say it? The ultimate issue came down to pride. Completely stupid and unchristian, but yes. I felt stage fright, which really boils down to not wanting to look like an idiot and embarrass myself (pride), but admitting thankfulness for something takes humility. While this doesn't seem to take a lot of humility, the act of thankfulness is a humble expression of gratitude.
I'm reminded of times I didn't thank someone, just because I was upset with them. My pride got in the way of expressing gratitude. I recall an instance when before Dad left for work, we had a huge fight that wasn't resolved before we had to leave. The next morning (Dad works night shift), I woke up to find apple juice on the counter. Dad had bought it for me on his way home, and dropped it off before he went off to run other errands.
Dang it.
Completely thankful for the apple juice, yet I did not want to tell him so. In my pride, I didn't even want to talk to him. I wanted him to apologize to me first, because I was "wronged". At the time, this gift of apple juice felt like manipulation, like now I had to respond and gift him with something, because I was in debt to him. In reality, my Dad was loving me, knowing that I loved apple juice and had wished for it a few days before. The Holy Spirit convicted me, and I thanked Dad for the apple juice... as well as apologized to him for the fight the night before. With this act of thankfulness and humility, I broke the chains of pride and arrogance and allowed a relationship to be healed.
We will also not give thanks if we feel we deserve or are entitled to what we are given. Here at the base, we get three meals a day (with enough left overs to make it five meals, our cooks are amazing). I can look at this situation and go "I deserve the food. I paid for this food anyway, was told to come live in community... of course they will give me food". This attitude comes out of a place of pride. My situation and food provision, as well as people willing to make the food so I can go to class, are blessings, not entitlements. When we humble ourselves to realize all things are a gift and a blessing, we are thankful for what we have been given and blessed with. As I learn and have a heart for at-risk children, I give thanks more and more for where I was born and the family I was born into. These aren't something I deserved or was entitled to, or simple coincidences... it was a blessing and a gift. Coming to this place of humility, I begin to really appreciate and take care of what I have. This, in turn, blesses others as I try to give them what was given to me.
You see, humility and thankfulness go hand in hand. As I grow in humility, I give thanks for the blessings I have been given. As I give thanks, I am humbled and see myself as I truly am, a daughter who is blessed in order to bless others.
Who doesn't love being thanked and appreciated for something they did? So I challenge you to do unto others as you would have them do, and give thanks to someone today. I promise you will love the feeling you get as you see their happiness in being appreciated.
"Do first, then teach" is one of the foundational principles of YWAM. So, I'll go first in this challenge. Thank you for reading my blog. Thank you for your prayer and financial support, and I thank you for your love and understanding as I share this journey with you.
God Bless, and have a happy Thanksgiving!
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